This picture has nothing to do with the post, but I thought it was funny and things don't always have to coordinate. Sheesh, stop being so OCD.
What I really wanted to let you know is that it's been a crazy ridiculous week. The kid I nanny got a concussion at wrestling practice, my doggie got bit by a german shepard and had to have surgery on her little patootie, and my sister's apartment caught on fire so a bunch of her stuff got ruined.
If you all could keep these people (and dog) in your thoughts and prayers it would be greatly appreciated. I'm so grateful that all three of them are OK with no lasting damage, but it's still no fun for them.
A couple days ago, I was watching E! true hollywood story:
kelly osbourne.Ok, actually, I was watching
the ‘keeping up with the kardashians’ and got too lazy to get up and change the
channel when it ended, so I ended up watching a documentary about kelly osbourne, but I digress.
To nobody’s surprise, kelly had a rough childhood.
They travelled a lot, she was a kid with a british accent growing up in america,
and, hello!, her dad was ozzy osbourne. It isn’t exactly pet golden retrievers and
white picket fences when your dad sings for black sabbath.
Anyways, kells was saying how the kids at her school
would pick on her, and she mentioned that “the religious ones” would tell her
that she was going to “burn in hell” because her dad bit the heads off of bats
and stuff.
What the what?
I literally started crying when I heard that, and
lest you think that is normal little j behavior, let me assure you that it is
not.
Sometimes (like when watching E: true Hollywood stories)
I get to the end of my rope with people who use the name of Christ to fuel
their own bigoted and prejudiced agendas.Then I wonder how many times I’ve done
something really crappy to someone (I assure you I have) and they’ve judged Christianity
based on my behavior.
Too often we forget what the bible actually says. Sure it would be nice to live in a world where everybody was perfectly biblical, but if
every single one of my friends quit going out drinking on Friday nights, would it
make any difference at all in light of eternity?
Nope.
We need to quit trying to force people who don’t
know Christ into a Christian lifestyle. When we do that, we are basically telling our friends "you have to earn your way to Jesus."I don’t hurt for my friends because they say cuss words, I hurt for them
because they don’t know God for who he really is.
I wonder how things could have been for kelly if
one of those “religious” kids had said,
“Hey, I see you’re new here. Let’s be friends.”
Any maybe that’s putting a lot of pressure on
elementary school age children, but I don’t think it’s too much to ask from us adults.
Feliz Navidad from mi casa! We got decked out in our finest Christmas attire, put on the Harry Potter soundtrack (what else?), and decorated the house.
I also watched an abc family original Christmas movie, which means that it's officially the season or that I need a life. or both.
What about you guys? Have you put up your trees yet?
P.S. You can't see the feet of my outfit, but it is indeed a onesie.
Today I forgot to follow one of my strict personal rules. Not the one about touching dryer lint or posting John Mayer lyrics as my facebook status...
I accidentally went to the mall after Thanksgiving. I love Hanes Mall, but after anytime after Turkey day, it becomes a horrible mass of angry suburbanites crowded into tiny aisles with pounding music fighting for overpriced clothing.
But today, in my haste to get a side-purse, I FORGOT, OK and went to the mall. I nearly had a panic attack in (our brand new) H&M, right behind the stack of brightly colored sweaters that are made by children in Mongolia very in right now.
I'm a little bit tired of Christmas already. Only a little though.
Spent the day at Stone Mountain with my Keej. We got lost twice, drove past the exit for home, and ate tons of ice cream. That's what she got when she asked for ONE scoop.
Keej: What's the difference between 'Moose Tracks' and 'Turtle Tracks'?
Icecream man: Moose have bigger feet.
Man: Do you like working here?
Icecream man: Oh yeah, after 4 years in the Marines, it's so exciting.
It is literally impossible to be sad while listening to this song.
Maybe you're stressed out, having a bad day, or trying not to be sad. If you are, take a couple minutes and listen to this song. Seriously, it's impossible not to feel a little happy while jammin' to it. Plus, if you're in your early/mid twenties, it probably reminds you of this:
I'm starting to think that this will be a recurring post theme. Environmental fail #3445.
My chissy has the prettiest, thick, auburny-ish hair. Because it's that unnameable season where everything gets super cold and gross, her hair has been looking dull. Naturally (pun intended), she wanted to try something environmentally friendly that would spruce up her hair,so she tried putting some egg in her hair and then let it sit for a little while.
She rinses it all out, blow dries her hair, and heads out into the wide world.
Then she notices that she has PIECES OF FRIED EGG in her hair. Apparently, she hadn't rinsed her hair as well as she thought, and the blow drying had effectively cooked the eggs into a delicious breakfasty treat in her hair.
On the plus side, she had something to snack on during the day. kidding!
Basically, my sis and I are the ultimate failures at being green. Poo.
Imagine that you are me. You decide to be daring today and shave your legs (dream big!). You slather some of that coconut oil that you wrote a post about loving on your legs. While pouring it, you notice some weird white streaks, but ignore them. Then, after you have covered both of your legs, you notice a strange smell.
"Hmmmmm..... what is that smell?" you think. You take a whiff of the usually delicious smelling oil and EW, it's the oil. Then, the words of your old "Nutrition of Domestic Animals" professor pop into your brain...
When the oil begins to oxidize, it will go rancid.
Horrified and covered in rancid oil, you start panicking and scrubbing at your legs for 20 straight minutes.
So the moral of the story, friends, is that even little j sometimes must eat her words and take back all the nice things she said about coconut oil.
Additionally, we ate at a place that served all organic and locally produced food on Friday and I was sick later that night.
I'm noticing an unpleasant trend. While I had dreams and aspirations that this blog might one day chronicle my ever increasing efforts to be green (and pretentious), it seems that instead, I am recording all the times I tried to be environmentally conscious and decided I didn't want to do it anymore, like switching from "clean" conditioner back to Tresemme.
Did you know that there's a website named "Drinkify"? You type in what kind of band you are listening to, and it tells you what alcoholic beverage will accompany your musical choices. I'm not really sure why StumbleUpon thought this website would be relevant to me, except that I'm writing a post about it.
After typing in 2 or 3 bands, I decided to see what would happen if I searched for Christian artists, and VOILA
As I am currently re-reading the Harry Potter books and it's "Harry Potter Weekend" on abc family (again), I'm dedicated this post to pure HP goodness. Also, I keep a folder of cool things I find on the WWW to share with you guys, and half of them were related to JK Rowling's magical series, so I figured it was time. Enjoy!
"Dudley looked alot like Uncle Vernon. He had a large pink face, not
much neck, small watery blue eyes, and thick blonde hair that lay
smoothly on his thick, fat head.
Aunt Petunia often said that Dudley looked like a baby angel. Harry often said that Dudley looked like a pig in a wig."
Did anyone else notice how yummy Neville got by year 7?
"I don't know who Maxime thinks she's kidding. If Hagrid's a half-giant,
she definitely is. Big bones...the only thing that's got bigger bones
than her is a dinosaur."
2. Gilderoy Lockhart, the insufferably vain professor and celebrity from The Chamber of Secrets, was based on someone Rowling knows in real life. “He used to tell whopping great fibs
about his past life, all of them designed to demonstrate what a
wonderful, brave and brilliant person he was. Perhaps he didn’t really
believe he was all that great and wanted to compensate, but I’m afraid I
never dug that deep,” she has said. “He’s probably out there now
telling everybody that he inspired the character of Albus Dumbledore. Or
that he wrote the books and lets me take the credit out of kindness.”
This morning I woke up and it was raining. Ugh.
And the weather had gotten all cold and winter- like. Double ugh.
And we're still out of bagels and cereal. Triple ugh.
In a classic case of self-fulfilling prophecy, the rest of the day followed along those lines. Headaches, bickering children, rattly cars, and STILL NO LAW AND ORDER ON TV. (Side note: When I first moved home, L&O:SVU was on EVERY DAY and now it is nevereverever on. Does anyone really watch Burn Notice? NO.)
Basically the whole day felt like this:
Blurriness and all. And if you are wondering why I'm wearing glasses that were trendy like 5 years ago, it's because I woke up this morning and my eye looked all gross, and because I am always behind the trends.
Also I had this conversation with someone that I spend 4 days a week with...
Person: Did you get new glasses?
Me: I don't normally wear glasses.
Person: Oh, I thought you looked different.
sigh.
I tried to listen to some Switchfoot and get my worship on, but even they were like "Don't bring that bad 'tude here." So I quit.
But now I'm home and I ate breakfast for dinner and Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets is on and things are looking more positive, so I'll stop writing this ridiculous post and go enjoy the rest of my night.
Confession: I do the grocery shopping in our household, and sometimes I'm really lazy about it. So when I woke up this morning, we were out of bagels, good cereal, and bread. I put my coffee on (we would NEVER run out of that), and looked into our near empty pantry and found a lone packet of REGULAR flavored instant oatmeal. Why do we even have that?
And then I got inspired.
PB&J oatmeal. Here's how:
1. Heat a little water to boiling and add just enough to the instant oatmeal for it to be moist.
2. Add a heaping spoonful of peanut butter and a normal-ish spoonful of jelly (so precise, I know) to your oatmeal and stir in!
3. Add a splash of milk or any amount to reach the desired consistency.
4. Enjoy with a cup of coffee and reruns of the Fresh Prince.
"I knitted this little cow toy for you while you were eating your waffle fries. It was my pleasure." -employee
I’m really feeling the random, rambling, short
essay-type posts this week. One of the
benefits of having your own blog, besides the adoring fanbase, is being able to
write about whatever random bit of fluff that drifts across your brain and then
people actually read it.
It’s almost like being Carrie Bradshaw.
Kinda.
I’m about to say something that may/may not
get me excluded from the Christian community.I’m going to talk about Chick-fil-a’s “second mile service” and how much
I DISLIKE IT.
What is
second mile service?, you ask.It’s
when you go to Chick-fil-a, just wanting a simple chicken sandwich, and the
employees come out to your car to take your order, or ask you for a drink
refill 156 times, or say my pleasure
at the end of every sentence.
What’s next? Hooking my brain up to electrical
wires when I come in, so that I don’t have to go through the effort of speaking
my order out loud?
Also, when the waitress comes to the table to take
my order, I have the awkward internal debate about whether I need to tip her.
Don’t do that to me, Chick-fil-a.If I
could afford wanted someone to call me by my name and put freshly ground pepper on my salad,
I would go to a restaurant that didn’t make all of their meals out of
differently shaped pieces of chicken.
END RANT.
P.S. I know that the technology for electrically reading
minds doesn’t exist (yet). I did major in biology, you know.
Did you know that as soon once you graduate from college,
you start aging exponentially?You’re
humming along, pulling all-nighters and eating pizza for breakfast, and then suddenly,
you fall asleep in the recliner at 11pm and your back hurts when you sleep in
someone else’s bed. Like going on vacation. Get your mind out of the gutter.
It’s not all hardship though.There are things, like paychecks, that help
make the aging process less horrible.
Anywho, since I went and got old and moved back to my
hometown, I’ve really been missing my friends from Raleighwood. So I was super
stoked when Amanda asked me to go to Carowinds with her.Carowinds is a super duper park of amusement
with amazing rollercoasters and pretty much nothing else, for those of you who
aren’t from NC.
Amanda’s message was basically this:
Dearest little j,
I really want to go to Carowinds.I wanted to know if you aren’t one of those
lame people who gets sick on rollercoasters and would go with me next
weekend.I really want to ride the
coasters so I hope you aren’t lame.
Love, Amanda
Of course she didn’t say it that way, because
Amanda is way nicer than I am, but that was the idea of the message.
I LOVE rollercoasters, so I excitedly said yes and
spent the week telling everyone who would pretend to listen to me about how I
WAS GOING TO CAROWINDS! YAY!
So Sunday arrives. It’s beautiful, chilly, and
there is absolutely no one in the park! Perfect amusement park conditions (for
those of you who don’t know)! We proceed to ride 10 (yes, 10!) rollercoasters
in a row, after which I find out that I AM one of those lame people who gets
sick on rollercoasters.
BUT, I’m super embarrassed because I accepted
Amanda’s invitation under the pretense that I am super cool/ won’t lose my
bagels on a rollercoaster. So I continue
riding rollercoasters without saying anything until, finally, even the little
kid coasters (Scooby Doo, anyone?) make me think I’m going to DIE, so I have to
ask Amanda to stop and eat lunch and SIT for a while.
Luckily for me, more people decided to
rollercoaster with us during the afternoon, so the waiting in line gave me time
to control my unruly stomach. I just
wanted to share this lame story with you so that you know what kind of
ridiculous person I am, like the kind that will almost throw up on a kiddie
coaster because they are too embarrassed to admit that rides make them nauseous.
You’re welcome.
P.S. We did this 5 times. In the front row. yeah, baby.
