this post is long overdue

she's going to kill me for posting this...

 i don't want to exaggerate, because then A MILLION people will be all worried, but last week was really one of the worst weeks i've ever experienced.

cliff notes version, my sis was in the hospital for some of last week with kidney stone number 3.  every time it would seem like she was getting better, that gosh darn stone would start moving again.  it felt like the nightmare that would never end.


anyhows, during this week, i kept praying and praying, but seemingly NOTHING changed. i mean, clearly, she got better since she's back to work and stuff, but it didn't feel like my prayers were heard or acknowledged at all.

i don't believe we should be whiny toddlers when God doesn't answer prayers they way we wanted him to; HOWEVER, i feel frustrated that we're supposed to come to him with our troubles and he didn't seem to be listening to mine.  what's the point in praying then?

so i got to this point in writing the post and couldn't think of anything else to say.  i really wanted to come up with some neat conclusion, something that would keep this post from sounding like I was saying that prayer is pointless (which is NOT what i'm saying), but I couldn't come up with anything.  so i let it sit till i found this...

But He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."  Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."

2 Conrinthians 12:9

i was reminded of why i write about spiritual things on this blog.  it's not so that i can share some sort of deep wisdom or theology with you, cause we all know i'm not qualified to do that.  it's because i want this to be a real blog.  i want other believers to know that it's okay to struggle and i want my friends who aren't to know that the Christian life isn't about being perfect.

so i'm boasting in my weakness. i don't have an answer to this insecurity (yet!), but in my weakness, His power is all the more evident.